Since I published the first bear spray story last year, I have had dozens of friends and strangers tell me their own stories of bear spray mishaps or send me links to bear spray accidents in the news. It seems that bear spray is used quite often, and almost never on a bear.
One friend, however, took it a step further and wrote a hilarious account of a time that a “bear” invaded a campsite in Glacier Bay National Park. Here is his harrowing tale:
Bear Spray Story Part 5: The Invaded Campsite
Written by Michael Augello
Cartoons by Jeff Bell
So, it was 2003, a bunch of Lodgies (a person who works at the lodge) wanted to go camping overnight in the Beardsley Islands. In order to get to the Beardsleys, one must kayak through the “cut,” a narrow passageway you can only get through during high tide. Unfortunately for my roommate and I, we had to work in the restaurant until close. High tide was at 3PM, and our shift started at 5pm. Our friends left around 2pm and began their journey into the enclosed waters.
Determined to go camping, my roomie and I decided to kayak through the cut during the day and hide our kayak in the woods at the far end of the Bartlett River Trail, a mile and a half hike from the lodge. That way, when we got out of work, we could simply hike the trail, jump in our kayak and search for our friends through the darkness.
After work, we hiked and arrived at our kayak around 11PM. After kayaking about an hour and half, we saw a small campfire in the distance. As we approached, we realized everyone had already settled in for the night and instantly decided to terrorize them by secretly approaching and thrash around the tents as angry bears.
As we hit their tents with branches and stomped around, we hid our laughter as our friends began to feel the fear of the great outdoors.
As we became louder and closer the screams began. It wasn’t long before one of the brave campers started screaming “Where’s the bear spray?!
In the darkness the search was difficult. As fear ripped into them the screams elevated and now we heard “WHERE THE F*** IS THE BEARSPRAY?!?!?”
Our muffled laughter turned to our own fear when someone said they got it.
We hit the tent one more time with branches before The Hero of the Night sprayed the bear spray out through the screen…
backfiring into the tent and forcing everyone to run out of the tent directly into the mouths of hungry bears!!!
Hahahaha.. of course it was not so funny in that moment for them, and after the anger subsided we stayed up the rest of the night joking and laughing. No one slept that night with such high energies and a tent uninhabitable. It was probably the best prank I’ve ever pulled! ~MA
So, who wants to go camping with Michael?
To catch up on the other bear spray stories, follow the links below:
Bear Spray Story Part 1: The Golden Grizzly Award
Bear Spray Story Part 2: Almost Killed by Puppies
Bear Stray Story Part 3: Tear Gas
Bear Spray Story Part 4: Marinated Meatballs
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Let me just say that had I been in that tent it would have taken me a long time to see the humour in the situation 🙂
Great story though!
Alison
I totally agree! What jerks! But it makes for a great story 12 years later.
MA and his friend should be very grateful it wasn’t me in the tent! I doubt they would be laughing yet! I bet you have enough stories you could write another blog and keep it going for ages with all the stories you’ve heard/received. Great cartooning BTW.
Yet another story confirming the utter uselessness of bear spray!
I think I’m going to email you the story of the time I was terrorized by a…. rabbit.
That’s great. I can never get enough of these bear spray stories.
Thanks Lyle. I have heard a few more but I’m not sure they are full length post material. Maybe we will have a post of vignettes. Do you carry bear spray?
Vignettes sounds good too. I have bear spray and often have it around me in bear country. The enduring question is whether the theory of how it works would actually happen when a bear is charging toward me. I like to think so but your stories cast serious doubt. Do you?
I don’t carry it but I probably should. I’ve only come face-to-face with a bear once and I handled it really well – I took off running. Luckily, he kept on walking and paid no attention to me. There are a lot of bears in Glacier Bay and I think next year I will get some.
You don’t have bear spray? You do write bear stories right? 🙂
and that is part of the reason I don’t carry it…
But you are a smart guy right? 🙂
That is debatable. Do you carry it?
Yes we do when hiking. We really do have a lot of bears. No cartoon worthy incidents. 🙂
I don’t wish a bad experience on you, but if one happens, I hope you are courageous enough to be a guest poster.
It’s a deal. 🙂
Very cool post, Jeff. Even cool pictures (for not being your photographs or cartoons). What I’m wondering is if they have gecko spray because I have gecko stories but no gecko spray stories.
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